Nathan sent this pic to me, unprompted, at work yesterday and I was shocked when I opened it. Week 21 next to Week 10. Walking around in normal clothes, I still don’t feel very big and anyone who doesn’t know me could never tell I’m pregnant. But….I feel so much lighter just looking at Week 10.
I’m a little terrified of getting huge. I look at the women in their mid to late 3rd trimesters and just cringe, it looks so uncomfortable. I don’t know, it’s gradual I guess, maybe it’ll feel normal just like I feel normal now? (I hope?)
Today is our 3rd wedding anniversary. We went up north for the weekend, which was nice (if only a little more boring than our usual “party at the local small town dive bar!” weekend trips). And tonight we were just gonna hang out at our neighborhood bar with friends, play some pool or whatever, but I’m tired and had a shitty day at work and feel a sore throat coming on….again….for the 2nd time this month. So instead Nathan went to the gym and I’m sitting here finishing a pint of Purely Decadent Dairy Free Turtle Trails Ice Cream (a splurge while we were on vacation this weekend – and so worth it – best vegan ice cream I’ve ever had, can’t tell the difference from the regular stuff.)
Maybe reminiscing will make me feel better. Unfortunately I don’t have any pics from our early days or wedding on this computer, they’re stashed away on CD’s somewhere….
Friday August 4th, 2006: I went out to dinner with three girls and happened to throw on a black strapless (casual, cotton) dress with my favorite vintage-y necklace. By the end of dinner I was sick of girl talk, not interested in joining them for various plans they had later, and wondering if my night was gonna be a bust. Then I got a call from my “office spouse”/cubicle mate/good friend Andy, who was just down the block at one of the best dives ever, the U Otter Stop Inn. Unusual, because he lived in a suburb about half an hour away at the time, but a very welcome change of plans.
I was sitting at a high top, feet up and at home in one of my favorite bars, when a guy comes in and makes a beeline towards me across the tiny space. He started just gushing over my outfit and how fabulous it was, dramatically going on and on. I could only laugh in my half drunk state and ask him if he was on drugs or did he always hit on people this way? He said “I’m not hitting on you, I’m gay! Just go ask my friend over there if you don’t believe me!” (Looking back, I don’t know how anyone could NOT know this guy was gay, but I’d been drinking and it was loud, etc. etc.)
The Otter is a place where everyone talks to everyone, (and I talk to everyone regardless of location), so I went over to the friend to get the gay verification. The friend was Nathan and I barely left his side for the rest of the night or since then. I can only describe it as this feeling of comfort, like it was just RIGHT to be next to him.
Eventually his friends were headed to another bar around the corner, and he pulled me out to leave with him when I almost stayed at the Otter to talk to some other friends of mine who’d just shown up. We ended up making out in a booth at Ground Zero (the only bondage bar in Minneapolis!) and then going up to the roof and stayed up talking until late late late. He told me that he’d gone to seminary school and been married and divorced twice and I literally got up to leave, thinking this was not my kind of guy and completely ready to walk back to my apartment ten minutes away. He convinced me to stay though and we crashed at his friend’s apartment above Ground Zero.
We made plans for him to join me for a friend’s b-day celebration the next night and after I verified he was normal upon 2nd inspection things were pretty cemented. We saw each other every day and two weeks later he was coming up to my cabin for our annual family party. There was never a question about whether or not we’d get married, I was crazy about him and the feeling was mutual. I’d never met someone I felt so sure about, who was so genuine and open and unfiltered with his feelings and funny and smart and most important of all just clicked with me.
(AND who will dress up for Halloween with me and is an awesome zombie makeup artist! Us at the zombie pub crawl two weekends ago.)
Love you hon.